In many ways, it is the same old-same old at the battle’s front these days, yet, somehow more sinister. Somehow increasingly more evil. But not subtle. The devil forswore subtilty long ago. Why need he be subtle, when he has such broad support among the assembled masses? They shout, they foam out their own shame, and we would fain retire to our bed, rather than our writing desk, if only for a moment of reprieve from the stupefying clamor of the doomed hoards outside. The firm application of a pillow to one’s ear might bring such relief to yours truly, but alas, we must report to you the news and other such outrages. And with that, we wearily present the following:
Not What You Were Expecting
If you are a UK male between the ages of 12 and 55 in need of a scan (Xray), be prepared to tell the radiographer whether or not you are expecting. That’s right. The good (?) people of the National Health Service (NHS) have recently rolled out guidance that requires males to fill out a pregnancy form. Of course, this has been standard for females for nearly the entire and storied history of radiology. Radiation can harm a baby in utero; so, men, know before you go!
The guidance, a nod to the modern gender confusion movement that has taken the western world by storm, has caused something of an outrage among male patients. According to The Telegraph, there are reports of irate men storming out of offices and neglecting scans altogether, unwilling to take the insult to their anatomy and intelligence. The NHS has cast too wide a net, it appears, one that strains out the gnat and swallows the proverbial camel. Or, to put it another way, they have thrown out the men with the bathwater that never had a baby in it. Ouch!
Experts and staff are warning the NHS that the policy is hurting patients more than helping them, as men cancel or otherwise decline to schedule a scan. Certainly, this is not what the NHS was expecting.
Something Save the King!
In further news related to our friends across the pond, The Christian Post reports that there are now more people in the UK who do not believe in God than those who believe. Explaining Atheism, a program overseen by Queen’s University Belfast recently reported the following interim findings of their three-year study:
•From 2008 to 2018, the number of those who disbelieve climbed from 35.2% to 42.9%
•In the same period, the number of those who believe dropped from 41.8% to 37.4%
•Those who say they don’t know if God exists actually dropped from 21.7% to 18.2%
Researchers point out that they are “limited” in being able to account for this shift, but believe it has a lot to do with socialization. “Our results show that the extent to which one is socialized to be a theist (mainly by parents, but also by wider society) is the key determining factor,” explained Professor Jonathan Lanman, a member of Explaining Atheism’s core team.
Now, everyone knows that the Church of England has been in dire straits for decades, and the King of England is the head of said church. But with numbers like these, we are made to wonder how long it will be before the first word of the national anthem must be changed to something a bit less divine. Odd, maybe?
Catholic Confusion
Pope Francis is at it again. The aging Pontiff, despite the increasing frailty of his health, continues to wreak havoc both within and without the Roman Catholic Church with his off-the-cuff remarks and personal support of practices inimical to the church’s doctrine. In September of this year, he traveled to Singapore, where he addressed an inter-religious meeting of young people. In published remarks posted on the Vatican website, Francis told the assembled youth, in part, “All religions are paths to God. I will use an analogy–they are like different languages that express the divine…[T]here is only one God, and religions are like languages, paths to reach God. Some Sikh, some Muslim, some Hindu, some Christian. Understood?”
In another recent (but persistent for Francis) episode, the Pontiff encouraged Ugandan LGBTQ activist Clare Byarugaba, to “keep fighting for your rights.” In a video posted on X, Francis is seen greeting Byarugaba. She says the Pope told her that “discrimination is a sin and violence against LGBTIQ communities is unacceptable.” Others present at the meeting came away encouraged to keep fighting against Uganda’s new Anti-sodomy Law, which prohibits same-sex relations under penalty of imprisonment and, for some cases, death.
Faithful Catholics may well scratch their noggins in wonderment and ask, “Does the Pope even read the catechism?” Readers of the Armageddon News, on the other hand, ask, “If the Father of the church has gone so far astray, can the children be far behind?”
And now, our task being completed, we withdraw ourselves, dear reader, from the fray–but for a moment–but for the twinkling of an eyelid and one Z. Certain we are that the cries and screeches of the motley crew will again reach fever pitch and awaken us, warranting another run of the presses. Babylon never disappoints.
